‘Twas the holiday season and out in the shed
your favorite designer had just bumped his head.
I staggered on out and into the night
when above me there shone a soft warm red light.
It’s Rudolph! I hollered, now feeling no pain,
stopped rubbing my noggin and called them by name:
“On Hosta! On Mahonia! On Compost, on Mulch!
On Ranunculus, Nepeta, and Sedum ‘Deep Gulch’!
I know I’ve forgot one but what can I do?
But simply point up and call out, Hey you!”
The dog was freaked out and was barking away
as there on my roof, a lipstick red sleigh
perched on the peak for my eyes to see
and just then the old elf slid down the chimney.
I crashed through the back door with one thought in mind,
could Santa be prodded with cookies and wine?
To give me the gift that I’ve wanted for years,
A real compost cannon with steampunkish gears?
I ran to the den to go plead my case
when I stopped short at the smile on Santa’s wise face
“I can’t give you a cannon, son, for without a doubt
you’re the type of moron who’d shoot his eye out!
But since you’ve been good and brought beauty and light
to all of your clients, I promise this night
your seeds will all sprout, your flowers will bloom
the beauty of Nature will fill outdoor rooms
I bring people joy just one night a year,
now here are the tools to spread much more cheer!”
He set down some boxes and before I could blink
he shot up the chimney, quick as a wink!
I trudged up the stairs, happy but worn,
to sleep like a rock until Christmas morn.
I tell you this story to get this off my chest
with every last one of you, I’m truly blessed
My wish now is for you to be of good cheer,